I Did Not Know What To Say Blog

Archive for the ‘Mother’s Day’ Category

Happy Mother’s Day to all the Mother’s out there and to my Mom watching over me!

Posted by ididnotknowwhattosay on May 13, 2018

Mother’s Day can be a difficult time for those that have lost a child, have had a miscarriage, a stillbirth or have lost their mother or grandmother. From my own experience, Mother’s Day is filled with mixed emotions of celebration and sadness from the loss of my mother, grandmothers and from my miscarriage.

For those that are grieving today, my hope for you is that your family and friends surround you with the love and support you need to heal your heart today.

“My mom is a never-ending song in my heart of comfort, happiness, and being.  I may sometimes forget the words, but I always remember the tune.”
~Graycie Harmon

Do you have a special tradition or celebration that honors your mom’s memory on Mother’s Day? We would love to be able to share your story with our readers. Please email your story to us at info@ididnotknowwhattosay.com.

Mother’s Day Remembrance & Grief Support Resources
Loss of a child, Miscarriage/Stillborn, Loss of a Mother & Loss of a Grandmother

Loss of a Parent
Resources on how to support a loved one grieving the loss of a parent.

Miscarriage ~ Stillbirth ~ Infant Loss
Resources on how to support a loved one grieving the loss due to Miscarriage, Stillbirth or Infant loss.

Mother’s Day Remembrance Gifts
Loss of a child, Miscarriage/Stillborn, Loss of a Mother & Loss of a Grandmother

Visit our Thoughtful Sympathy Gifts page for a wide variety of sympathy gift ideas for your loved ones. We hope the thoughtful gifts listed on our website inspire you to give warmth and joy to your friends and family in their time of need.

Sending lots of love and hugs today,

Lori Pederson, Founder
I Did Not Know What To Say.com

Posted in Grief Support & Holidays, Loss of a Child, Loss of a Mother, Miscarriage, Mother's Day, Stillborn, What to do for someone that is grieving | Tagged: , , , , , , | Leave a Comment »

Mother’s Day Remembrance

Posted by ididnotknowwhattosay on May 14, 2017

Mother’s Day can be a difficult time for those that have lost a child, have had a miscarriage, a stillbirth or have lost their mother or grandmother.

 “A mother is not defined by the number of children you can see, but by the love she holds in her heart.”
~  Franchesca Cox

For those that are grieving today, my hope for you is that your family and friends surround you with the love and support you need to heal your heart today.

“A mother is she who can take the place of all others but whose place no one else can take.”
– Cardinal Mermillod

Do you have a special tradition or celebration that honors your mom’s memory on Mother’s Day? We would love to be able to share your story with our readers. Please email your story to us at info@ididnotknowwhattosay.com.

Mother’s Day Remembrance & Grief Support Resources
Loss of a child, Miscarriage/Stillborn, Loss of a Mother & Loss of a Grandmother

Loss of a Parent
Resources on how to support a loved one grieving the loss of a parent.

Miscarriage ~ Stillbirth ~ Infant Loss
Resources on how to support a loved one grieving the loss due to Miscarriage, Stillbirth or Infant loss.

Mother’s Day Remembrance Gifts
Loss of a child, Miscarriage/Stillborn, Loss of a Mother & Loss of a Grandmother

Visit our Thoughtful Sympathy Gifts page for a wide variety of sympathy gift ideas for your loved ones. We hope the thoughtful gifts listed on our website inspire you to give warmth and joy to your friends and family in their time of need.

Sending lots of love and hugs today,

Lori Pederson, Founder
I Did Not Know What To Say.com

Posted in Loss of a Mother, Loss of a Parent, Mother's Day | Tagged: , , , , , , , , , | Leave a Comment »

Happy Mother’s Day to all the Mother’s out there and to my Mom watching over me!

Posted by ididnotknowwhattosay on May 8, 2016

Mother’s Day can be a difficult time for those that have lost a child, have had a miscarriage, a stillbirth or have lost their mother or grandmother. From my own experience, Mother’s Day is filled with mixed emotions of celebration and sadness from the loss of my mother and from my miscarriage a few years ago.

For those that are grieving today, my hope for you is that your family and friends surround you with the love and support you need to heal your heart today.

 “A mother is not defined by the number of children you can see, but by the love she holds in her heart.”
~  Franchesca Cox

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“The death of a mother is the first sorrow wept without her.”

Do you have a special tradition or celebration that honors your mom’s memory on Mother’s Day? We would love to be able to share your story with our readers. Please email your story to us at info@ididnotknowwhattosay.com.

Mother’s Day Remembrance & Grief Support Resources
Loss of a child, Miscarriage/Stillborn, Loss of a Mother & Loss of a Grandmother

Loss of a Parent
Resources on how to support a loved one grieving the loss of a parent.

Miscarriage ~ Stillbirth ~ Infant Loss
Resources on how to support a loved one grieving the loss due to Miscarriage, Stillbirth or Infant loss.

Mother’s Day Remembrance Gifts
Loss of a child, Miscarriage/Stillborn, Loss of a Mother & Loss of a Grandmother

Visit our Thoughtful Sympathy Gifts page for a wide variety of sympathy gift ideas for your loved ones. We hope the thoughtful gifts listed on our website inspire you to give warmth and joy to your friends and family in their time of need.

Sending lots of love and hugs today,

Lori Pederson, Founder
I Did Not Know What To Say.com

ididnotknow

Posted in Grief Support & Holidays, Holiday Grief Support, Loss of a Child, Loss of a Mother, Loss of a Parent, Mother's Day, Uncategorized, What Not to Say to a Grieving Loved One, What to do for someone that is grieving | Tagged: , , , , , , | Leave a Comment »

Happy Mother’s Day to all the Mother’s out there and to my Mom watching over me!

Posted by ididnotknowwhattosay on May 10, 2015

I know Mother’s Day can be a difficult time for those that have lost a child, have had a miscarriage, a stillbirth or have lost their mother or grandmother. From my own experience, Mother’s Day is filled with mixed emotions of celebration and sadness from the loss of my mother and from my miscarriage a few years ago.

For those that are grieving today, my hope for you is that your family and friends surround you with the love and support you need to heal your heart today.

 “A mother is not defined by the number of children you can see, but by the love she holds in her heart.”
~  Franchesca Cox

Do you have a special tradition or celebration that honors your mom’s memory on Mother’s Day? We would love to be able to share your story with our readers. Please email your story to us at info@ididnotknowwhattosay.com.

Mother’s Day Remembrance & Grief Support Resources
Loss of a child, Miscarriage/Stillborn, Loss of a Mother & Loss of a Grandmother

Loss of a Parent
Resources on how to support a loved one grieving the loss of a parent.

Miscarriage ~ Stillbirth ~ Infant Loss
Resources on how to support a loved one grieving the loss due to Miscarriage, Stillbirth or Infant loss.

Mother’s Day Remembrance Gifts
Loss of a child, Miscarriage/Stillborn, Loss of a Mother & Loss of a Grandmother

Visit our Thoughtful Sympathy Gifts page for a wide variety of sympathy gift ideas for your loved ones. We hope the thoughtful gifts listed on our website inspire you to give warmth and joy to your friends and family in their time of need.

Sending lots of love and hugs today,

Lori Pederson, Founder
I Did Not Know What To Say.com

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Posted in Grief Resources, Grief Support & Holidays, Loss of a Child, Loss of a Grandparent, Loss of a Mother, Loss of a Parent, Miscarriage, Mother's Day | Tagged: , , , , , , , , | Leave a Comment »

Virtual Book Tour – Interview with Uma Girish – Author of “LOSING AMMA, FINDING HOME: A MEMOIR ABOUT LOVE, LOSS AND LIFE’S DETOURS”

Posted by ididnotknowwhattosay on August 7, 2014

Thank you for joining us on our Virtual Book Tour.

Today we welcome UMA GIRISH, author of “LOSING AMMA, FINDING HOME: A MEMOIR ABOUT LOVE, LOSS AND LIFE’S DETOURS”. Uma’s interview offers many insights into life, death and losing a parent.

Please feel free to comment or share your own experiences on how your friends and family have assisted you in restoring balance in your life after the loss of a loved one in the comment section below

1. What inspired you to write the book LOSING AMMA, FINDING HOME: A MEMOIR ABOUT LOVE, LOSS AND LIFE’S DETOURS?
When a loved one dies, all hope dies with them. In picking up the pieces of my life, and finding a way to make meaning of my loss, I felt that this message needed to be shared to inspire everyone dealing with a devastating loss. That was the main reason why I felt compelled to write this memoir. Also, I have long since known that the gift of writing was given to me to serve the world. This was one of the ways I was called to do that.

2. How did your mom’s passing help you learn more about Love, Life and Life’s Detours?
Amma’s passing caused a deep existential ache within me. In trying to figure out my own purpose and what I was meantLosing Amma to do with this life, I discovered that love is all there is. Our biggest purpose in this life is to love one another. Life is all about the soul’s evolution and the wounds we are given are meant to be used as lessons. The only way we can use the pain of loss is by reaching out and helping someone who has lost a loved one. My life took a detour, both geographically and spiritually. That detour saved me. It opened me up. It taught me that when a path opens up for me, I am meant to walk down that road with trust and integrity.

3. How did finding your life purpose assist you in the healing process?
It taught me that my life was less about me and more about everyone I touched. And that was the only way to heal. It taught me that I could only heal when I connected with and served another who was in pain. I am only able to do that when I am willing to open my heart and share the truth of my story. When I share with honesty and vulnerability, I make the greatest of connections: the human connection. So finding out what I was meant to do with this wonderful life was key to not only how I healed, but how I helped others heal their pain.

4. What are some of the cultural differences in working through grief that you experienced between your home country of India and the US? What cultural differences should people be aware of?
In India, grief and mourning are communal and collective events. It I much more public than it is in the West. It is not uncommon to see funeral processions take over the main thoroughfares and inconvenience traffic, even during rush hour. The body is atop a decorated carriage which is then paraded through the streets, rose petals are showered through the journey to the crematorium and there’s dance and music to accompany the funeral party. I experienced isolation here because I didn’t know too many people or have friends. I was new. My mother had no context. It was very alienating. I longed for the familiar: my family, my environment, my cultural context where I knew what was appropriate to say and do.

5. Our website focuses on providing tips to friends and family members on how to support a loved one through the grieving process. What would be your suggestions on how friends and family can support a loved one that has lost a parent?
• Don’t be impatient with their grief. People take as much time as they need to, to mourn and grieve a loss. If you’re unable to bear witness to their pain, don’t. If you are, then be patient with their recovery process.
• Share stories. Tell them stories they don’t know about their loved one, about your interactions with them or an act of kindness you received from them. Don’t make the dead person invisible by not mentioning their name.
• Allow them to lead. A lot of times we feel the need to tell the griever what they need. Ask them to voice what they need and serve that need if you’re able to.
• Avoid clichés like “You had her all these years” or “God doesn’t give you more than you can handle” or “Time heals everything.” If you don’t have words, say nothing. Just listen. Hug. Show up. That’s all we need to do when there’s nothing to fix.

6. What do you wish your family or friends had done differently after you lost your mom?
I wish they hadn’t buried my mother all over again—by not mentioning her name for fear that it would make me cry. I wish they had been more patient with my grief instead of telling me that I’d cried enough and that it was time to move on. I wish I hadn’t heard the words “So many orphans don’t know what it is to have a parent. At least, you had her all these years.” I wish they’d been more interested in stories about my mother, the only way I had of keeping her alive.

7. What is one thing you would like readers to take away from your book?
That pain and grief are not given to us by some avenging God. They are part of our soul’s growth and when we turn our pain into purpose, we heal and we use our pain to serve from a bigger platform and help others heal.

8. What would you like our readers to know about you?
I am passionate about helping women who are grieving a loss turn their pain into purpose so that they can find new meaning and joy in their lives. As a Certified Dream Coach, I also help women who feel lost, or those who are in transition, to get clear about their passion and purpose using a 10-step program.

9. Have you written any other books? Do you plan to write any other books in the future?
Yes to both! My eBook is called “Understanding Death: 10 Ways to Inner Peace for the Grieving” and is available as a Kindle and Nook version, and also on iTunes. Writing, speaking and teaching are as integral to me as breathing. I’m halfway through my next book and also plan to teach writing workshops soon.

UGirish 2

 

ABOUT UMA GIRISH

Uma Girish is a Grief Guide, Certified Dream Coach, and award-winning author whose work has been published in 7 countries. She hosts a weekly radio show “The Grammar of Grief.” For archived shows, visit http://uma.creatingcalmnetwork.com to buy a copy of her memoir “Losing Amma, Finding Home” please visit http://www.umagirish.com. You can also stay updated on her events by subscribing to her newsletter via her website.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Our Virtual Book Tourhttp://www.ididnotknowwhattosay.com/griefbooks-virtualbooktour.html

Grief Support Resources: http://www.ididnotknowwhattosay.com/grief_support_groups.html

Posted in Loss of a Mother, Loss of a Parent, Mother's Day, Share Your Story, Virtual Book Tour | Leave a Comment »

Happy Mother’s Day!

Posted by ididnotknowwhattosay on May 12, 2014

Happy Mother’s Day to all the Mother’s here and in Heaven and to my Mom who is always watching over me.

I know Mother’s Day can be a difficult time for those that have lost a child, have had a miscarriage or have lost their mother. From my own experience, Mother’s Day is filled with mixed emotions of celebration and sadness from the loss of my mother and from my miscarriage a few years ago. For those that are grieving today, my hope for you is that you are comforted with warm memories of your mom, grandmother or your precious child.

“My mom is a never ending song in my heart of comfort, happiness, and being.
I may sometimes forget the words but I always remember the tune.”
~Graycie Harmon

Do you have a special tradition or celebration that honors your mom’s memory on Mother’s Day? We would love to be able to share your story with our readers. Please email your story to us at info@ididnotknowwhattosay.com.

Loss of a Parent
Resources on how to support a loved one grieving the loss of a parent.

Mother’s Day Remembrance Gifts
Loss of a child, Miscarriage/Stillborn, Loss of a Mother & Loss of a Grandmother

Visit our Thoughtful Sympathy Gifts page for a wide variety of sympathy gift ideas for your loved ones. We hope the thoughtful gifts listed on our website inspire you to give warmth and joy to your friends and family in their time of need.

Happy Mother’s Day!

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Posted in Grief Support & Holidays, Grief Support Discussion Topics, Holiday Grief Support, Loss of a Child, Loss of a Grandparent, Loss of a Mother, Loss of a Parent, Miscarriage, Mother's Day | Tagged: , , , , | Leave a Comment »

I Did Not Know What To Say Newsletter Archive

Posted by ididnotknowwhattosay on July 18, 2013

I Did Not Know What To Say Newsletter Archive

Over the last several years we have provided articles and interviews on a variety of topics on how to assist a loved one through the journey of restoring balance in their life after a loss. I have put together a resource list below for you to explore and/or pass on to a loved one that might benefit from these tools. 

If there is a specific topic that you would like us to include in one of our upcoming newsletters, please email us.
 

Understanding Grief 

Are Grief & Depression the Same Thing? 
by Mark D. Miller M.D.
Dr. Miller explores the differences between Grief and Depression.
 

Helping Dispel 5 Common Myths About Grief
by Alan D. Wolfelt, Ph.D.,
Alan D. Wolfelt’s article describes five of the most common myths about grief. Through understanding and overcoming these myths we can find positive ways to help ourselves and others heal. 

Anticipating Grief
by Cheryline Lawson
Cheryline’s article gives an overview of how anticipating the loss of a loved one that is terminally ill can affect family, friends and the person who is dying.  
 

How to Support and Care for a Grieving Loved One

What To Say… When You Don’t Know What To Say 
by Lori Pederson, Founder, I Did Not Know What To Say
Finding the words to support a loved one through the grieving process.
 
What Not to Say to a Grieving Loved One  
by Lori Pederson, Founder, I Did Not Know What To Say
Knowing what not to say can be just as important as finding the right words to comfort a  loved one when they are grieving.
 
SHOULD I OR SHOULDN’T I? 
by Ann Leach, President, Life Preservers: a global grief support community
Ann’s article will give you concrete ways to provide support in the simplest of ways to a     
grieving loved one.
 
by Lori Pederson, Founder, I Did Not Know What To Say
Helpful way to assist your love one find fun & adventure again. 
 
by Joan Hitchens, Storybooks for Healing
Tips on how writing about a loved one can be an effective tool for those grieving to process their feelings and help them restore balance in their life.
 
by Lori Pederson, Founder, I Did Not Know What To Say
After the loss of a loved one, there is nothing more important you can do for a friend than being a good listener.  The Gift of Listening offers 10 Tips on how to improve your listening skills.
 
by Jill Rheaume, Creator, Our Stressful Lives
Jill’s article will explore healthy ways to handle the little and big stressors in your life. 
 
by Tamar Fox
Tips to take into consideration if you’re called on to bring food to a family member or friend who’s ill, recovering from surgery, or dealing with a recent loss. 
 
by Lori Pederson, Founder, I Did Not Know What To Say
You just received a phone call letting you know that your friend has lost a loved one. You now have a decision to make…What kind of supporter do you want to be? 
 
by Lori Pederson, Founder, I Did Not Know What To Say
Tips on how to choose a sympathy gift that expresses your deep concern.
 
by Lori Pederson, Founder, I Did Not Know What To Say
Sharing gratitude to those that have provided support during a loss.
 

Walk Beside Me and Be My Friend
by Nan Zastrow 
Explores how relationships can change after the event of grief. Some relationships will strengthen, some relationships will end and new relationships will begin.
 
Please Cut the Grieving Some Slack
by Maribeth Coye Decker, Sacred Grove Bodywork
This article reminds us that we are all human and that we need to let kindness and forgiveness guide us when we encounter strange behaviors from those that are grieving.

Reaching out to the bereaved and getting no response
by Robbie Miller Kaplan, Author How to Say It, When You Don’t Know What to Say
Explores the reasons why someone may not respond when they are grieving and how to not take it personally.

How to Talk to Someone Who is Grieving
by Rachel Walton, MSN, CRNP
Rachel’s article offers many valuable suggestions on how to talk to and more importantly listen to someone who is grieving.

Effective Communication Skills During Grief and Mourning Following a Family or Relationship Death
by Rick Goodfriend
Rick Goodfriend’s article offers several useful suggestions on how to communicate effectively with a loved one that is grieving. 
 
Interview with Robbie Miller Kaplan – How to Say It, When You Don’t Know What to Say


How to Support a Grieving Loved One during the Holidays
 
 
The First Holidays After a Loss – How You Can Offer Your Support
by Lori Pederson, Founder, I Did Not Know What To Say
Tips on how to support a grieving friend or family member as they experience the holidays for the first time without their loved one.
 
 
Helping Children Grieve during the Holidays
by Miri Rossitto founder of Valley of Life memorial website & author of
 
A Guide to Children and Grief
Useful suggestions on how to assist a grieving child express their feelings of sadness as well as honor the memory of the loved one that passed away.
 
by Lori Pederson, Founder, I Did Not Know What To Say
Having the support of friends and family during the holidays can make all the difference. Sometimes support and love are the best gifts you can give a friend that is grieving.
 
by Lori Pederson, Founder, I Did Not Know What To SaySometimes the perfect gift is not perfect at all. It is your willingness to look awkward and not know what to say, and yet still show up and be there for a friend that is grieving that matters most.
 
by Lori Pederson, Founder, I Did Not Know What To Say
Holidays can be a difficult time for those that are grieving. We have compiled a list of 12 simple and meaningful ways to support your grieving friends this holiday season.
 

Thanksgiving Memories: Love, Loss and Good Eats
by Gloria Arenson, Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist 
A wonderful reminder of the simple ways to remember a loved one during the holidays.

How to Support a Grieving Window/Widower

by Marcy Kelly, Author of From Sorrow to Dancing
Marcy has provided us with her insights and suggestions on how to assist a grieving widow.
 
by Carole Brody Fleet, Author of Widows Wear Stilettos
Carol offers several fun filled suggestions on how to get through – and even enjoy Valentine’s Day when you are a widow or on your own.
 
by Taryn Davis, Founder, The American Widow Project
Writings & Tips for those who know someone who has lost their hero in the military.
 

How To Date/Marry A Widow or Widower
by Ellen Gerst
Grief and Relationship Coach, Ellen Gerst, offers several practical suggestions on how to be sensitive to your partner’s loss and at the same time grow your relationship.

Interview with Pat Nowak – ABC’s of Widowhood 

Interview with Ellen Gerst – Love After Loss: Writing The Rest of Your Story 

Interview with Carole Brody Fleet – Widows Wear Stilettos 

Interview Marcy Kelly – From Sorrow to Dancing 

Interview with Lori A. Moore – Missing Andy 

Interview with Michael Corrigan – A Year and a Day

Interview with Jennifer Hawkins – The Gift Giver


Suicide Survivors

Helping a Suicide Survivor Heal
by Alan D. Wolfelt, Ph.D.
Alan D. Wolfelt, Ph.D. article provides many useful strategies on how to support your friends and family dealing with this type of loss.

The Myths Surrounding Suicide
by Catherine Greenleaf
Catherine Greenleaf offers insightful information on how to assist a loved one that is a suicide survivor.

Interview with Catherine Greenleaf – Healing The Hurt Spirit: Daily Affirmations for People Who Have Lost a Loved One to Suicide


How to Support a Grieving Mom

What Grieving Moms Want for Mother’s Day: The Comfort Company Offers 10 Simple Ways to help Moms Cope When Mother’s Day Hurts
Survey conducted by the Comfort Company – What Grieving Moms Want for Mother’s Day is a compilation of over 200 survey responses on how you can help the grieving moms in your life cope with Mother’s Day.

Broken Angel
by Janet Kohn, Co-Founder The Broken Angels Grief Support Group
Janet offers a simple, yet profound way to explain to friends how grief changes parents who have lost a child to substance abuse.

Am I a Mother – Tips for Handling Mother’s Day After Miscarriage
by Lisa Church of HopeXchange
Lisa Church’s article explores how to ease the pain of the loss of a pregnancy and how to find hope and healing.  For friends and family, Lisa’s article is a great resource on how to offer your support on Mother’s Day.

Loss from a Miscarriage and Stillborn 

Interview with Veronica Janus – Abundantly More  

Interview with Laura Smith – In All Things Giving Thanks When Hope Seems Lost 


How to Support a Grieving Dad
 

by Kelly Farley, Founder of the Grieving Dad’s Project
Many men feel alone in their grief after the loss of a child. Kelly Farley, Founder of the Grieving Dad’s Project, offers many ways to support grieving dads by sharing his personal story.

Interview with Kelly Farley – Grieving Dads: To The Brink and Back


Loss of a Parent
 

Mother’s Day Remembrance
by Lori Pederson, Founder, I Did Not Know What To Say
Tips on how to support a loved one who is grieving the loss of their mom on Mother’s Day.
 
by Janell Vasquez of Memories are Forever
Janell’s article offers many suggestions on how to create a lasting tribute by designing a personalized memory book to honor your father’s memory. 
 
What to Do on Father’s Day When Dad is Deceased
by Laurie Mueller, RTC, ID, AED, Med
Laurie Mueller offers practical tips to honor the important men in your life that have passed away.

Interview with Chelsea Hanson – Sympathy Matters Collection

Loss of a Pet  

Loss of a Pet – How to Bring Comfort to a Grieving Friend
 by Lori Pederson, Founder, I Did Not Know What To Say
Lori’s article offers several suggestions on how to support a friend that is grieving the loss of their beloved pet.

Support & Resources for Traumatic Loss and Natural Disasters

Natural Disaster Recovery Guide
by Dwight Bain
Dwight Bain’s article is an insightful look at the emotional side of disaster recovery.

Resources for Traumatic Loss 
Resources and helpful tips on ways to support those that are grieving in the wake of a tragedy. If you have a resource to share, please email us at info@ididnotknowwhattosay.com

How to Support a Grieving Child

Interview with Lynn S. Combes – A Garden Full of Butterflies

Posted in Children Grief Support, Father's Day, Gratitude, Grief Resources, Grief Resources - Newsletter, Grief Support & Holidays, Grief Support Discussion Topics, Holiday Grief Support, Loss due to Suicide, Loss of a Child, Loss of a Father, Loss of a Mother, Loss of a Parent, Loss of a Pet, Loss of a Sibling, Loss of a Spouse, Men & Grief, Military Loss, Miscarriage, Mother's Day, Share Your Story, Thanksgiving, Virtual Book Tour, What Not To Say, What Not to Say to a Grieving Loved One, What to do for someone that is grieving | Tagged: , , , , , , , , | 3 Comments »

My Mom’s Last Mother’s Day

Posted by ididnotknowwhattosay on May 12, 2013

My Mom’s Last Mother’s Day
by Lori Pederson
Founder, I Did Not Know What To Say
www.ididnotknowwhattosay.com

Mother’s Day, 1993 would be the last Mother’s Day I would spend with my mom. I remember this day vividly because despite being terminally ill, my mom mustered up enough energy to travel across country from California to Washington, D.C. to be with me as I graduated from The George Washington University.

Because I worked at the University, many of my colleagues gave my mom the VIP treatment. Escorting her to the front row where they had a special place for her wheelchair and they continued to check on her throughout the ceremony. I thi296581_3630874139321_250941145_nnk my mom received more attention from the staff than Hilary Clinton, who was the keynote speaker that year.

To see her daughter graduate with a Master’s degree was a moment of great pride for my mom. As many women of her generation, my mom never finished college because she got married and had children. Education was always important to her and she made sure my sister and I had every opportunity to go to college.

My mom was always my strongest supporter and advocate. When I was in Junior High, I did not test well on “standardized tests” and my mom fought with the school to allow me to enroll in higher level courses. I am grateful to my mother for continuing to believe in me, even when the school system did not. Had it not been for her perseverance and love for me I may have never gone to college at all.

I am sure she would have given me all the credit for getting my Master’s Degree, but I know that I would not have ever been able to accomplish this goal without her motherly influence. I am forever grateful for her love and support. Her strong influence in my life made me who I am today. Her loving spirit will always remain in my heart.

“My mom is a never ending song in my heart of comfort, happiness, and being. I may sometimes forget the words but I always remember the tune.”
~Graycie Harmon

 Loss of a Parent
Resources on how to support a loved one grieving the loss of a parent.

Mother’s Day Remembrance Gifts
Loss of a child, Miscarriage/Stillborn, Loss of a Mother & Loss of a Grandmother

Visit our Thoughtful Sympathy Gifts page for a wide variety of sympathy gift ideas for your loved ones. We hope the thoughtful gifts listed on our website inspire you to give warmth and joy to your friends and family in their time of need.

©2013 Lori Pederson
WANT TO USE THIS ARTICLE IN YOUR E-ZINE OR WEB SITE? You can, as long as you include this complete blurb with it: Lori Pederson, Founder of I Did Not Know What To Say, a website created to inspire and to provide you with tools to assist a loved one through the grieving process. If you would like our free newsletter on how to assist your friends and family through the journey of restoring balance in their life after the death of a loved one, please visit our website at www.ididnotknowwhattosay.com.

Posted in Loss of a Mother, Mother's Day, What to do for someone that is grieving | Tagged: , , , | Leave a Comment »

Thinking of you on Mother’s Day

Posted by ididnotknowwhattosay on May 13, 2012

Thinking of You with Love

We thought of you with love today, but that is nothing new.
We thought about you yesterday, and days before that too.
We think of you in silence, we often speak your name.
All we have are memories, and your picture in a frame.
Your memory is our keepsake, with which we will never part.
God has you in His keeping, we have you in our hearts.
A million times we’ve wanted you.
A million times we cried.
If love could only have saved you, you never would have died.
It broke our hearts to lose you. But you didn’t go alone.
For a part of us went with you…the day God called you Home.
~Author Unknown

 

Happy Mother’s Day to all the mothers here and those watching over us.
Happy Mother’s Day to my mom – we miss you and love you!
To those grieving today the loss of a mother, grandmother or child, our hearts go out to you.
May you be surrounded by love today.

 

Do you have a special tradition or celebration that honors your mom’s memory on Mother’s Day? We would love to be able to share your story with our readers. Please email your story to us at info@ididnotknowwhattosay.com or include them in the comment section below.

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Posted in Loss of a Child, Loss of a Grandparent, Loss of a Mother, Loss of a Parent, Miscarriage, Mother's Day | Tagged: , , , | Leave a Comment »

Mother’s Day Remembrance

Posted by ididnotknowwhattosay on May 6, 2012

Mother’s Day Remembrance
Tips on how to support a loved one who is grieving the loss of their mom on Mother’s Day

Mother’s Day for many is a day of family celebrations. But for those of us whose mothers have passed away, Mother’s Day can be a day filled with sadness and longing to have one more day to spend with our mothers. 

If you have a friend or relative whose mother has passed away, here are a few suggestions on how to reach out to them on Mother’s Day.

  1. Acknowledge the loss. Take a few minutes to let your friend know that you are thinking about them and remembering their loss by sending them a card or giving them a call on Mother’s Day.
  2. Listen, Listen, Listen.One of the most important things you can do is to make yourself available and truly listen.
  3. Don’t minimize the loss if they are older. Losing one’s mother is a significant loss, nomatter what age the person is when it occurs. Don’t trivialize the loss if the person is older.
  4. Send a gift of remembrance. Consider sending a personalized gift that honors the memory of your friend’s mother. Some suggestions include: a personalized picture frame, a memory book with photos of their mother, a tree memorial they can plant in their garden, or a special piece of jewelry that reminds them of their mother. Click herefor more gift ideas.
  5. Take them to their mom’s favorite place for brunch or to a special spot. Is there a place that they traditionally took their mom on Mother’s Day?
  6. Send flowers.Consider sending them a bouquet of their mother’s favorite flowers and include a card with a message “Thinking of you and remembering your mom today.”
  7. Write a tribute. If you knew their mom, write a tribute and send it with a card or if they have a memorial site, post it on the site on Mother’s Day.
  8. Help them plan a Mother’s Day Memorial. Help create a day of celebration that friends and family can share stories and pictures that celebrate the life of the mother that has passed away.
  9. Take them on an adventure.Holidays can be heavy, filled with a wide array of emotions. If your friend is up for an adventure, think of activities that will bring your friend joy. Go for a spa day, play a round of golf, take them to an amusement park, or go away for the weekend to a place they always wanted to go. Make it fun and stress free.
  10. Respect their decision on how they would like to spend Mother’s Day. Understand that there will be times that your grieving friend may want to be alone or may want to completely ignore the day. There were many years that I would go to the beach by myself on Mother’s Day to be alone with my thoughts.

Holidays, like Mother’s Day, birthdays, and the anniversary of the person’s death can be difficult, particularly the first year. A simple act of kindness that is delivered with an open heart during these special occasions lets your loved one know they are not alone.

Do you have a special tradition or celebration that honors your mom’s memory on Mother’s Day? We would love to be able to share your story with our readers. Please email your story to us at info@ididnotknowwhattosay.com or include them in the comment section below.

Loss of a Parent
Resources on how to support a loved one grieving the loss of a parent.

Mother’s Day Remembrance Gifts
Loss of a child, Miscarriage/Stillborn, Loss of a Mother & Loss of a Grandmother

Visit our Thoughtful Sympathy Gifts page for a wide variety of sympathy gift ideas for your loved ones. We hope the thoughtful gifts listed on our website inspire you to give warmth and joy to your friends and family in their time of need.

©2012 Lori Pederson
WANT TO USE THIS ARTICLE IN YOUR E-ZINE OR WEB SITE? You can, as long as you include this complete blurb with it: Lori Pederson, Founder of I Did Not Know What To Say, a website created to inspire and to provide you with tools to assist a loved one through the grieving process. If you would like our free newsletter on how to assist your friends and family through the journey of restoring balance in their life after the death of a loved one, please visit our website at www.ididnotknowwhattosay.com.

Posted in Grief Resources, Grief Resources - Newsletter, Grief Support & Holidays, Holiday Grief Support, Loss of a Child, Loss of a Grandparent, Loss of a Mother, Mother's Day, What Not to Say to a Grieving Loved One | Tagged: , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a Comment »