I Did Not Know What To Say Blog

Archive for September, 2009


Posted by ididnotknowwhattosay on September 27, 2009

IMG_0309This September we celebrated my grandmother’s 90th Birthday.  Over the past 90 years, my Grandma Dolly has watched the world change before her very eyes.  She grew up in the depression, she had to convince her father to allow her to go to high school (can you imagine?), she raised 6 children, helped my grandfather run their family farm, and she has many grandchildren and great grandchildren to keep her busy.  

She has also been through many struggles.  She watched her husband lose his battle with cancer when he was only 54, she endured watching her eldest daughter Judy die from ovarian cancer when she was only 50 and then two weeks later lost her second daughter Pam in a fatal car accident. Three years ago, she had to watch her daughter Carol lose her battle with melanoma.  She has lived through heart surgery, knee surgery and even shingles.  

So what is her secret to living a long life? 

She has a toughness that comes from living on the farm.   Her faith in God has sustained her thIMG_0346rough the many joys and sorrows throughout her life.  She focuses on the deep love she has for her family and she has a wonderful doctor that treats her like she is his own mother.  She says…I shed my tears, I say a little prayer and I move on with my day.   She is also very passionate about her garden…she loves her flowers.   Every spring you can see her out planting her flowers and mowing her lawn…yes, she still mows her own lawn.

My grandmother has been the icon of my Aunt Pat’s business Granny’s Kitchen Fudge Puppies for the last sixteen years.  At the Minnesota State Fair she is known as Granny.  She reminds everyone of their grandma or the grandma they wish they had.  To my Grandma Dolly, working with Granny’s Kitchen each summer has been one of the great joys in her life.  Granny’s Kitchen gave her a life purpose and a reason to keep going.  (you can see more pictures of Granny at www.grannyskitchenfudgepuppies.com)

This year we celebrated her 90th Birthday at the Minnesota State Fair.  As you can see from the picture, my grandmother is a good sport and has a fun goofy side to her.  Throughout the day, Granny’s fans stopped by to wish her a Happy Birthday and to sign her guestbook.  She loves the attention (although she will never admit it.) 

She is the matriarch of our family, the keeper of our family memories and has been a stable force throughout my life.  She is an amazing woman that we all love very deeply.  Losing my mother when I was 25 was difficult but having my grandmother around for all these years has eased some of the pain.  She is not perfect but she is perfectly wonderful to me.  Please join me in wishing her a very Happy Birthday.

Posted in Gratitude, Inspiration | Tagged: , , | 4 Comments »

The Importance of Having a Will

Posted by ididnotknowwhattosay on September 21, 2009

As part of our series on Planning For A Life Without You, we conducted the following interview with Michael Murphy, ESQ, to give our readers an overview on the importance of having  a will. 

1. What are the most important reasons for writing a Will?

   A.  To insure assets are left to the people you want to inherit them
   B.  To be sure that the person in charge of your estate is the person you want
   C.  To insure someone is named to take care of young children if both spouses die
   D.   To be sure you use any tax avoidance benefits available 

2.  Do I need a Will if I don’t own a home or have children?    

      Yes, for all of the above reasons. 

3.  What happens if I don’t have a Will? 

Anyone even creditors can apply to manage your estate; assets go as directed by State law instead of as directed by you and any tax avoidance opportunities may be lost. 

4.  How often should I update my Will?

Whenever there is a significant change in wealth status, any change in marital status, the arrival of children or every 5-10  years whichever occurs first. 

5.  What are the most important facts to consider when writing a Will?

   A. Consider ways to avoid probate costs
   B. Consider ways to avoid  tax consequences
   C.  Select people to be in charge of children and/or your estate who are responsible and suitable to carry out your wishes

6.  What are benefits of using an attorney as opposed to writing your own Will?           

An Attorney will know costs and taxes that can be avoided if the Will is structured properly and will be familiar with issues relevant to your state and your courts.  An Attorney will see to it that your Will is executed properly.  If your Will is not executed properly it can be invalidated.

7.  What are most important things to look for in hiring an Attorney to write your Will?  

You should consider the length of time the Attorney has been in the practice of law and the percentage of time devoted to Wills and probate matters. The more time the better, preferably more than 50%.  

The above information was provided by Michael A. Murphy, Esq.  He and his wife Ann practice law in Fairfax County, Virginia.  Tel # 703-455-7177.  Both graduated from Georgetown University Law School.  Ann has been in practice almost 27 years.  Mike has been in practice over 35 years.  Both devote the majority of their practice to Wills, Trusts and Probate matters.   

Posted in Planning For A Future Without You | Tagged: , , , , , | 2 Comments »

I Did Not Know What To Say Newsletter – Sign Up Today!

Posted by ididnotknowwhattosay on September 6, 2009

Don’t miss our monthly newsletter featuring tips, articles and inspirational stories on how to assist a loved one through the journey of restoring balance in their life after a loss.

September 2009-Featured Article:

The words Courage, Strength and Character are words that not only describe the men and women that serve our country but the family members that support them.  This month we honor the brave widows and widowers that have lost a loved one in military action.

By Taryn Davis, Founder/President, The American Widow Project

Integrating back into civilian life after such a loss can be hard and painful.  If you are in the community show that the camaraderie is still there through helping mow the lawn or picking up groceries for the family…

To read more, Click on the link below to sign up for our Monthly Newsletter:

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