I Did Not Know What To Say Blog

Archive for June, 2010

Virtual Book Tour – Interview with Lori A. Moore – Author Missing Andy

Posted by ididnotknowwhattosay on June 28, 2010

Thank you for joining us on our Virtual Book Tour. 

Today we Welcome Lori A. Moore, the author of Missing Andy.  We are delighted that Lori has been able to provide us with her insights and suggestions on how to assist a loved one that has lost her ex-husband and best friend.  Please feel free to comment or share your own experiences with grief and the healing process in the comment section below.

Missing Andy is featured on our Helpful Books page under Grief Support & Loss of a Spouse.

And here is our interview with Lori A. Moore… 

What inspired you to write the book Missing Andy?

My husband of 12 years died in 2008 at age 49. He threw a blood clot approximately 15 hours post-surgery for a hip replacement. We held his funeral on what should have been his 50th birthday. Even though we were divorced at the time of his death, he was my best friend and we talked to each other every single day and hung out a couple of times a week.  I started writing as a way to express my thoughts and my grief.

Is there any one thing that your family or friends did for you that assisted you through the grieving process?  (i.e. a special card someone sent you, a favorite place they took you, listened when you needed support, etc.)

My friends were very patient with my crying and my telling them frequently how much I  missed Andy.  My brother, who doesn’t say much, came through in a big way and was very supportive of me during my grief. Even now, almost two years later, almost 

book-cover-missing-andy

every conversation includes an “Andy” story and they are very understanding about why I talk about him so much even though he’s gone.

What do you wish your family or friends had done differently after Andy had passed away?

A couple of friends, within a month of two of Andy’s passing would say, “You need to get over it,” or “Aren’t you over that yet?”   That really hurt.  You don’t just “get over it.”  Others asked, “But he was your ex-husband, why would you be upset about him dying if you weren’t still married to him?”  They simply didn’t understand the relationship.  After Andy’s death, his family was upset that Andy had made me beneficiary of a larger sum of money than he left to them and they got a little ugly about it. Dealing with those issues on top of my grief was almost too much to handle.

What is one thing you would like your readers to take away from your book?

Grief is normal and it’s okay to grieve. You’re grieving for yourself because the loved one that you lost, if he/she was a Christian is in a perfect place that is so much better than here on earth.  They’re okay, even if you’re not okay for a while. 

What are your top three suggestions to help people move forward in the grieving process?

  • Talk to a grief counselor.
  • Give yourself time to grieve.
  • Find a creative outlet for your grief, such as scrapbooking, writing, journaling, etc. so that you can spend some happy time remembering the person that you’ve lost.

What do you want our readers to know about you and your book?

I wrote this book to deal with my grief, but also as a way to honor Andy for the wonderful man that he was.  The majority of the profits from this book go to Andy’s favorite charity, The WHAS Crusade for Children, an organization in Louisville, KY that benefits special-needs children.

Have you written any other books?  Do you plan to write any other books in the future?

My first book, written at the same time as Missing Andy, is titled From Zero to Christian in Just 35 Years which is a compilation of three stories making up my testimony of how I gave my life to Christ.  The title comes from the fact that I had never set foot inside of a church of heard of Jesus Christ until I was 35 years old.  

My next book is due out this Fall (2010) and is a children’s book titled Grady the Gray Cat. 

About Lori A. Moore

Lori A. Moore teaches college both online as well as in her hometown of Louisville, KY where she lives with her husband Michael and their three cats.  Lori has a passion for adults who haven’t yet experienced a relationship with Christ because everything they’ve heard is kind of formal and scary.  She tries to write with humor and on a down-to-earth level that people can relate to and understand. 

Twitter @Lori_A_Moore

http://loriamoore.tatepublishing.net

 

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Posted in Grief Resources, Inspiration, Loss of a Friend, Loss of a Spouse, Virtual Book Tour, What to do for someone that is grieving | Tagged: , , , , , , | 4 Comments »

Happy Father’s Day

Posted by ididnotknowwhattosay on June 20, 2010

Father’s Day can be difficult for those that have lost their father.

For those that are grieving today, my hope for you is that you are comforted with warm memories of the special times you have spent with your father and grandfathers.

Happy Father’s Day to all the wonderful men who make a difference in our lives every day!

Dad, your guiding hand on my shoulder will remain with me forever.  ~Author Unknown


Posted in Gratitude, What to do for someone that is grieving | Tagged: , , | Leave a Comment »

How to Support Someone Who Has Lost a Loved One – 21 Ways to Help a Grieving Friend

Posted by ididnotknowwhattosay on June 17, 2010

I Did Not Know What To Say I am very honored that Beliefnet.com has featured my EBook on 21 Ways to Help a Grieving Friend on their website. This piece was born out of my gratitude for my friends and family that were there to support me at time of great loss. Thank you Laurie Sue Brockway, Inspiration Editor at Beliefnet for all of your support.

How to Support Someone Who Has Lost a Loved One – 21 Ways to Help a Grieving Friend- Beliefnet.com

Losing a loved one can be an extremely difficult time in a person’s life. These 21 tips are meant to help you find supportive ways to assist someone you care about through the journey of restoring balance in their life after a loss. Written by Lori A. Pederson of IDidNotKnowWhatToSay.com.

Let us know if you have any ideas to add to the list. We are working on 101 Ways to Help a Grieving Friend and would love to hear your suggestions.

Posted in Grief Resources, Inspiration, Thoughtful Sympathy Gifts, What to do for someone that is grieving | Tagged: , , , , | Leave a Comment »